Pathways to Leadership

Our Mission is to unleash the verybest in People, Teams and Organizations.

Steven Vannoy,
President and Founder

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Craig Ross,
Director of Pathways

The Power of the Glass

by Steven W. Vannoy and Craig Ross

While the old expression "your glass is either half empty or half full" is truly insightful, there may be more to it than what can be seen at face value.

It is human nature to go towards what we focus on. Keeping that in mind, when we decide how empty or full our glass is -- for instance, how much or little we enjoy our job, how happy or stressful our home life is -- it is going to become emptier or fuller depending on how we view any given situation. The amount of "liquid" in the "glass" never remains the same -- it either lessens or becomes more full.

A happy, productive life isn't about avoiding difficult times, but great good can be gained by looking at the glass as half full when we are tempted by a challenging situation to focus only on what's lacking. By shifting our mindset and focusing on what's positive, what's working well - and not wasting time dwelling on the half-empty portion of the glass - we see the "liquid" that is there and can watch it increase.

We all go through difficult times now and then. When they come, we can make the commitment to view them as growing opportunities, and we become stronger than ever in the process. Through our determination to be the best that we can be, our glass, inevitably, becomes fuller.

The environment within a home or organization never stays the same. The atmosphere either becomes more enjoyable, productive and functional or it begins to disintegrate and become a place of discomfort, dysfunction and inefficiency. The implications of growing and maintaining a strong culture is huge. It affects everyone who comes in contact with it -- colleagues, family and friends. Viewing challenges as opportunities for good, we are an example to others on how to live with a positive outlook and with a glass overflowing with a happy, healthy quality of life.

Try asking yourself the following questions when you are faced with a challenge and need help moving on. Allow yourself to focus on filling the glass instead of feeling helpless, or negatively tipping it so that the liquid drips out. Remember, our actions allow us to choose whether the quality of our life becomes incredibly enhanced or significantly reduced. What an empowering concept!

1. What am I feeling?

Acknowledge how you're feeling and accept that emotion.

2. Is it okay to feel that way?

All emotions are okay, as long as we realize that how we react to those emotions is what really matters. If we respond to our emotions in a healthy, positive way we can take a difficult situation put it in perspective. We can focus on the positive aspects of the person or situation we are struggling with.

3. Is what already occurred or who I'm conflicted with going to be that way whether I like it or not?

There are certain things in life that we have absolutely no control over. The actions and behaviors of people may never change and difficult events may occur beyond our control.

4. Is the person I'm conflicted with human?

See the person you're dealing with for who they are -- an individual with flaws who makes mistakes just like the rest of us. Also, consider the possibility that he or she may have been going through challenging circumstances that you weren't aware of at the time. Maybe they didn't have all of the necessary information that caused them to respond or act as they did.

5. Am I human?

Remember to have compassion for yourself also, and give yourself a break. We all make mistakes. Instead of continuing to blame yourself and dwelling on the anxiety you may be feeling, consider what can be learned from the experience. The longer we dwell on our mistakes, the longer we live in the past.

6. What can I learn from this experience and how can I move forward in a healthy "win-win" way?

Now... Put together an action plan on how to best move forward. Refill your glass using plans that lay out how you're going to change your outlook on the situation and why you're a stronger person for having gone through it.

And, you'll be all the stronger the next time that old glass needs refilling!